Why I’m a Mel Robbins Fan (and Why You Should Be, Too)

I have to preface this article. I am a Mel Robbins fan-girl. I saw her speak at a corporate event. I’d read nearly all of her books and listen to her podcast. All that said, I may be a bit biased, but read on.

Raise your hand if you’re someone who struggles with people-pleasing, setting boundaries, or constantly wondering why people do what they do. Then this book might be what you need.

Struggle with People-Pleasing or Overthinking? This Book Might Be for You

In her latest groundbreaking book, “The Let Them Theory” by Mel Robbins—New York Times bestselling author and one of the world’s most respected experts on motivation, confidence, and mindset—teaches you how to stop wasting energy on what you can’t control and start focusing on what truly matters: YOU. Your happiness. Your goals. Your life. In her signature no-nonsense style, Robbins delivers a powerful message:

Stop trying to control everything and everyone. Let people do what they want.

Sounds simple, right? But trust me, the impact of this mindset shift is huge.

What The Let Them Theory Is Really About

At its core, “Let Them” is about freeing yourself from the emotional exhaustion that comes from overthinking other people’s actions. Robbins argues that when you accept that people will do what they want—and that you can’t control their choices—you free up your own energy to focus on what really matters: your happiness, goals, and peace of mind.

Why Mel’s Style Hits Different

One of the most refreshing things about this book is how relatable and conversational Mel Robbins is (and why I’m a huge fan). It feels like you’re sitting across from a brutally honest but caring friend who isn’t afraid to call you out on your self-sabotaging habits. She shares personal stories, practical advice, and easy-to-implement tools to help you let go of the anxiety and frustration that comes from trying to manage others.

A standout section of the book talks about the power of accepting reality instead of resisting it. Robbins gives the example of how we waste energy getting upset when people don’t act the way we expect. Whether it’s a flaky friend, a critical boss, or a partner who isn’t meeting your needs, she urges readers to stop fighting reality and instead ask, “What do I want to do with this information?” That subtle shift puts the power back in your hands.

Another gem? The “Let Them Theory” itself. The idea is simple: When people show you who they are, believe them. Let them flake, let them judge, let them do what they want—and instead of wasting energy being upset, choose how you want to respond. It’s a mindset shift that can save you so much mental and emotional energy.

Practical Tools You Can Actually Use

One thing I appreciated is how Mel Robbins doesn’t just preach, she gives practical steps to implement these ideas. From how to identify your emotional triggers to scripts for setting boundaries without the guilt, the book is packed with actionable advice. If you’ve ever struggled to say “no” without feeling bad or wondered how to stop replaying conversations in your head, you’ll find some real-life strategies you can use immediately.

Of course, the book isn’t about becoming indifferent or cold. Robbins is clear that letting people do what they want doesn’t mean tolerating disrespect or neglecting your needs. Instead, it’s about recognizing that your peace of mind is worth protecting, and the only person you can truly control is yourself.

A Word of Caution: Context Matters

To play devil’s advocate, using the “Let Them” theory does need some self-imposed guardrails. You have to be selective when it comes to your career and your children. For example, you’re not going to completely disregard your boss or let your children run amok. But I do think for areas of life where we ruminate or overthink in various social scenarios or relationships, this guidance is a wonderful way to relieve unnecessary anxiety and stress.

If you’re ready to reclaim your energy, stop the overthinking spiral, and start living life on your terms, “Let Them” is a must-read. Mel Robbins delivers a bold, practical guide to letting go of what you can’t control and focusing on what you can.

Best of all, the book addresses how to use this theory in your relationship and with your children. Robbins shares her own personal stories, which is incredibly endearing and makes me love her even more!

How do you feel about letting go and the “Let Them” theory? When is it a good idea to use this approach, and when should you not?